Quests/dialogue

World 1 - Blunder Hills

Scripticus

Quest name	Dialogue
Hardcore Gamer Status, Here I Come!	"Ah, another poor soul to add to the list!", "List of what, you ask? Just look around you! The grassy platforms, the slow-moving clouds, the fact that the main NPC is a giant piece of paper..." "You're the latest entry in the list of Nooby Gamers!" "I know this must still be a shock for you, since only a moment ago you were a Massive Legend Gamer on their way to beating up the final boss.", "Actually, there is one thing that might turn you back into a Pro Gamer! Now stand back as I utter the magic words... Git Gud." "Hahaha I had to do it to ya! There's no shortcut back to the top. You're gonna have to level up, craft armor, master Skills, fight bosses, and complete hundreds of quests before you become a legend again!" "Speaking of quests, I'm the main quest giver, and here comes your first mission!" "That was amazing! Those punches were incredible, and your patience to sit there and not uninstall the game served you well!"
Gear Up, Gamer!	"Let's get you a better weapon, those bare fists can only slap so hard! Try making some boxing gloves over at the anvil! "Drag those gloves to the grey sword outline to equip them! I also gave you a stylin' headband, which you can also equip onto the helmet slot.",   "There we go, you're looking like a real street fighter now... or like some sort of 'grass-platform' fighter at least!",
Mr. Worldwide	"Now lets find you some tougher monsters! Defeat enough spores to unlock the next map. Can't have a promising player like you stuck in one place!" "You seem a bit beat up! I forgot to tell you, monsters get real tough real quick around here -- lemme show you something that might help."
The Choice is Yours!	"You get 3 talent points every time you level up your Class Level. You also get 1 talent point every time you level up a skill that you specialize in. There are also special STAR talents to collect, which use separate talent points!", "Did you get all of that? I'll add a Hint to your codex about Talent Points if you ever forget. Now go spend those points!", "Oh... wow. Those were uhh, interesting choices. I think you're gonna need some more power to have a fighting chance against those froggies.",
Certified Swinger, of Pickaxes, of Course!	"Go check out that portal on the left. There's a cheerful goblin who will show you some new gameplay! I haven't actually seen him in a while, but I bet he is as happy as I remember!", "Great, I'll go ahead and take that! I've been trying to pass his class for 3 years but I'm literally incapable of doing anything other than wiggling around and talking, so I always fail his tests."
The Smithing Grind	"Now then, use what you learned to get the materials needed to craft some new Equipment at the Anvil! Go do that while I go get this certificate framed... or maybe I should get it laminated..." "All suited up and ready for the next quest, eh? Alright! Wait no, actually not alright. I need to go run some errands first. Tell you what, why don't you help me with them?"
The Unoccupied Picnic	"I went for a Picnic the other day out in the Frog Fields, and I forgot to bring home the basket! There wasn't much in there, other than a jar of Golden Jam that I need back!" "Oh boy, I can't wait to have me some of this golden jam! " 'Scripticus opens the fake jar filled with springs' "BWAH! WHAT THE WHAT??",   "I guess you could say that jam..." " ...was a scam! Hahahaha! A bad pun is what you get for pullin' that prank. Alright, lets just quickly move on and forget that just happened...",
Seeking Foreign Aid	"I think it's time we get real here gamer. Remember how you got absolutely owned by that griefer in World 4, and fell all the way down here?" "You may not remember this, but when you hit the ground, you knocked off the Orange Gem powering the town's portal! If we're gonna get you back to being a Top Gamer, that crystal needs to be returned!" "I'm not sure who or what stole it, but they sure aren't around here anymore. But I know someone who can help. There's an ex-town member who went to live out in the jungle, his name is Silico... no wait, was it Skullco?" "I... actually dont remember his name. He did tell me once, but I couldn't understand his accent and I'm too embarased to ask." "Anyway, he's our best bet at finding out who took the Town Gem! We can figure out a plan once we have more info." "Perfect, and you even got a signature! Now then, what is his name... Smmffephhzcho? Oh come on, his name is smudged!" "Oh well, at least Smmffephhzcho did a good job with the report. According to his findings, you'll need to go into the Encroaching Forest, several maps past the Jungle." "Whoopsies!"
What Lies at the Heart of the Forest	"I've never actually been that far away from town... In fact, no one here has, and I don't think any of them are about to change that!" "But you've come a long way since that epic fall from gamer grace, so why don't you go check it out for yourself? Come back when you know more about the place!" "Forest villagers have the gem thief locked up and are using it as a tourist attraction? That's uh... oddly convenient. I guess that's what happens when a developer tries to put context behind a QoL feature, haha."
The Bigger they are, the Bigger they fall!	"Well, it's all up to you now! Go defeat that thief and take back our Town Crystal, even though you'll basically topple the Forest Village's entire Tourist-Based economy in the process!" "Lets goooo!!! Just tap on our Builder Bird to restore power to the portal. Finally, I can start sending letters to all myrelatives in the other worlds! I can't wait to tell them how epic I was at teaching you everything you know!"
Champion of the Grasslands	"Go make me the 3 Blunderhill Tokens of Completion, and you can have my Blunder Hills Trophy! Here's the token recipes. You'll find all their ingredients just from doing everything that this World has to offer!" "Wow, I never thought someone would care enough about the first world to do everything! It feels like just yesterday I signed you up into the Game's Database... to think I'm now giving you the highest honor one can get! You're one heckin' sick gamer, wear this trophy with pride!", "Alright, I think you're about" "cool"

Glumlee

Quest name	Dialogue
Learning to Swing	"Uuugh... another one? Are you here to 'learn new gameplay' or whatever rubbish all the others keep saying?" "Lets be honest, this is all super obvious stuff... I mean it's just mining right?"   "WRONG! There is so much to mining! Mining efficiency, power, STR, accuracy, multi-ore mining, we have a lot to cover!"   "Go mine some ores, and read this while you do. Mining Efficiency is your main stat here. It is boosted by your STR stat, as well as your Mining Power, which comes from pickaxes and other equipment!" "You can actually see your accuracy. Tap MENU, then AFK INFO, then look at the bar in the bottom left!"
Learning to Smelt	"Now go to that forge, and drag the ores into the 1st slot. Also, drag the Oil Barrel I gave you into the 2nd slot. It'll speed things up." "Smelting bars uses multiple ores. Later bars, like Iron and Gold, will require more Ores per Bar. Tap on Ore in your inventory to see the exact numbers!"
Literally Burning Your Money	"Final task now. Go to the forge, click the Yellow Arrow tab in the top right, and buy some Upgrades. These are Permanent, and are shared between all your characters." "Well, that's it. Now you know how to get all the resources mining has to offer. I'm actually pretty pleased with how you did, I'm glad you paid attention and didn't skip through my dialogue instantly like everyone else does!" "In fact, why don't you come back once you've gotten a bit more experienced? I'm more than just a pouty goblin with a repeating 5 frame animation!!"
The Impossible Task	"... because I actually have 6 frames! The part about me being pouty was true. @ Well? Go on, get more experienced and come back! @ Return at Mining Lv.13" "Alright kid, or man, or baby, whatever you are behind that screen, I'm gonna let you in on a secret."   "You ever notice how I never leave this map, not even to level up my Class Level from fighting monsters? Well, there's a reason..."   "I get class exp from mining. Boom, mic drop." "... that would've gone better on grass. Can you get that for me? I've kinda got my hands full. " "Go ahead and use that Star Book I just gave you. It's very important for you Skiller type characters! Come talk to me after you do, and I'll explain it."   "Basically, you can now choose a skill to also give you Class EXP. This way, you can focus on skilling while still leveling up, so you won't miss out on all the Talent Points you get from leveling up your Class." "You can change your mind as often as you want, but remember that the Class EXP you get comes from your Skill EXP, so you will get a bit less Skilling EXP if you have this active." "I'll have quests later on that increase that Talent's max level above just 40, but those will be added in later."

Woodsman

Quest name	Dialogue
A noob's first swing	"Ho traveller, great day for choppin wouldn't you say?" "I just felled this tree beside me! Looked to be a tough job at first, but it was all bark and no bite... That tree over there though has got me stumped!"   "Care to give it a try? I'd do it myself but I wouldn't want to embarass a beginner like you!" "Thanks for the logs, but I may have to explain the premise of chopping down a tree a bit more clearly next time."
A noob's 2nd first swing	"See how your tree over there is a tree, and mine here is... well, not a tree anymore? Please make yours a bit more like mine." "I don't need any more logs my boy, I just want to see you fell that tree! I'm gonna have to dumb it down a bit for you aren't I."
It's Just a Plank bro!	"Hit tree with sharp hammer. Make tree go timberrrr! Then me happy and give you good stuff." "Hahahaha, you should've seen your face! You can't chop down trees in this game, it was just a prank my boy! This stump here? It's just a prop! Here, take my spare prop as a gift for being such a good sport!" "Hope the hat fits! I've got a few more gags, but those will have to wait!"

Picnic Stowaway

Quest name	Dialogue
The Hungry Stowaway	"... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ..." "... what, were you expecting a picnic basket to talk?" "Crap did I just say that out loud..." "Well don't just stand there ya goof, you'll blow my cover! Now get lost, this ain't your picnic, and anyway there's not enough room in here for both of us!" "What? The owner just wants their jam back, and won't mind me staying here? Great! How about I don't give you the jam back, and I still stay here!" "Well come on now, I aint gonna give you part of my stash here for nothin'. This is a picnic basket not a charity house! Bring me something and maybe we can fix up a deal..." "Well well well, these don't look too bad! I think we can work out a trade right here right n--- wait, where's the ketchup... or the mustard??"
Beating Up Frogs for some Sauce	"Why don't you go 'ask' the frogs around here for some Condiments. Those Fists of yours seem like persuasive talkers! I'll hold onto these nomwiches in the meantime... for safe keeping, you know?" "Great, these will do. Now all I need is something to watch while I'm eating! What, were you expecting me to just look at the grass grow while I eat? I don't even think grass grows in this universe."
Live-Action Entertainment	"One... two... THREE!!! Oh, and these monsters have Increased Damage, watch out! If you fail, you can forfeit and retry using the Codex!" "That was amazing! Best meal I've had in ages. You can have this golden jam, but I dont want ya just givin' it to some fool, you're the one who helped me after all."   "Thats why I've prepared a fake jam jar, filled with springs! Give that one back instead, and they'll be so embarassed by the prank that they'll try to move on from it rather than ask for the real jar!" "Come back again some time, yea? This picnic basket is filled with golden foods that aint good for a fella like me, and I'd be willin' to give em to ya at the right price." "Ah my friend, welcome back! I'm in a bit of a situation that needs explainin' if your willin' to listen." "I just realized that I need to eat every single day! Go figure, I thought I could just eat once and I'd be good for life." "Every day, I will have a series of quests to complete, each one harder than the last! You can complete as many as you want, but after 24 hours, you will start back at the first quest! Think of this as a repeatable Daily Questline."
The Most Important Meal of the Day	"Well, it's the start of a new day now, so lets get on with breakfast!"   "Have you heard the story of Green Legs and Ham? The kid in the story didn't like green legs and ham, but I wanna judge it for myself. @ QUEST:Get frog legs and bean slices" "Nom nom nom... eugh, no wonder the kid dies of food poisoning this universe's version of the story, those were terrible. Maybe they'll taste better tomorrow."
Brunchin' with the Blobs	"My blobulyte buddies are coming over in a bit, I need some food for us to eat and decor for them to hide behind!" "Nothin' beats chillin' with the bros over some good food, and especially when it's so roomy in here! I'm glad this is a Non Euclidean basket, else it'd be cramped down in 'ere!"
Luncheon with the Inlaws	"I just wish I hadn't told my in-laws about that, then maybe they wouldn't be joinin' me for lunch today. But I've got a plan to dip out hehehe..." "It worked! I just poured the oil over a stack of bars, and they couldn't even tell the difference! Kinda says a lot about what I look like, but who cares right?"
Afternoon Tea in a Jiffy	"I could really go for a spot of tea, but some jar of sand fell in love with my teacup, the stupid thing! He took it and ran deep into the Jungle." "Heh, perfect. That pesky sand jar has been pining for my teacup ever since he saw some manga online about a sentient 500 year old teacup girl or something. Kids these days, right??"
Early Evening Eating Endeavor	"I'm feelin' hungry again, why dont you go get some desert Kebabs? And get me a bowl too, I can't eat them off the stick." "Ah, cooked to perfection! I can't believe this stuff aint popular here in Blunder Hills, it's the bomb! ... err, I didn't mean it like that."

Typhoon

Quest name

Difficulty

Surprise Attack

"Hello citizen, the colosseum peanut gallery is on the third floor, in the upper left corner. Viewer admission is free as per Executive Order 66." "Wait, you want to be a combatant? Yea well, I'm going to do you a favor and NOT register you as a combatant."   "BAM! Element of surprise! Any fighter worthy of the colosseum has to be ready for monsters appearing out of nowhere! Defeat these frogs, and I'll let you in!" "Yea alright, so you beat up some frogs, that's nothing compared to some of the waves you'll face in there! Well, except for the frog wave, that's about the same."   "Come tap on me every day to get another ticket, given you're a registered combatant now. And don't think I won't recognize you on your other characters! You only get 1 ticket every day!"

Mr Pigibank

Quest name

Dialogue

A pig and his stamps

"Hmpf, by the looks of your clothes I don't suppose you're here to make a deposit." "Ha! Don't worry lad I'm just messin' with you. The name's Preston Pigibank, used to run a chain of highly successful banks from here to the Snowy Mountains if you can believe that!" "Of course, I had to sell the business once those fancy chests came around. Can you believe those things? You put your items in them, and they just magically appear in all the other chests!" "All this free time serves me well though, I've gotten to pursue my passion for collecting rare and powerful items, and I get to spend more time teaching my kids about business." "Well, not so much that last part anymore... I haven't seen any of the little ones for a while, and even worse my recent collection of Power Stamps disappeared!" "Tell you what, if you find out who ran off with my Stamps, I think I may be able to set up a business with you!" "Ah, looks like you have some news! So, who was the wretched monster that stole my stamps? ...what? You didn't get a clear look of them? Oh well, it was probably just an old business rival of mine." "Well, good thing is I've actually found some Stamps in my desk while you were gone, so at least we can start with something. So lets talk business!" "These stamps aren't just pieces of paper, they actually give their owners Special Bonuses! I'm not really the adventuring type, so how about we sell Ownership of the stamps to others! And by 'we' I mean Me, and by 'Others' I mean You!" "So have we got a Deal? Great! Bring me all the stamps you can get, and I'll give you their Bonuses for a bit of money!"   "Hang on lad, you look familiar... did you get a haircut? Hahaha, I'm only foolin', I know all about the multi character system in this world!"   "Come on over, I'll give you access to your stamps! No need for that prequest nonsense, OINK!"

Town Marble

Quest name

Dialogue

Visualizing the Sculpture Within...

"Forsooth, this town hath bequeathed unto me yet another philistine not worthy of laying so much as a fiddlestick upon my divine surface!"   "But hark, what be this I see? Mayhaps a glimmer of hope through yonder eyeball breaks, upon which mine surface doth reflect?"   "Could you be the one to craft me into the formation I was destined to asssume? @ QUEST:Sculpt this marble into a statue worthy of the gods." "Aha! Now all shall bear witness to ultimate perfection! Please, do return with any other statues you may come across on your journey, so that they too may bask in my greatness!"

Hamish

Quest name	Difficulty
The Hamazing Plot Twist!	"Hi, want to trade stuff? I have tons of cool things, oak logs, bleach logs, maple logs, you name it!" "You want a stamp? I have one of those!!! Me and my siblings all nabbed one from our Dad before we left home! He wanted to teach us economics and business... boring! We just want to adventure!" "I guess the stamp is kinda cool, but I'd rather have a real Hatchet! The one I have now is plastic. @ QUEST:Find an axe to trade for the stamp!" "Deal! This is gonna bump up my choppin power so much, I bet I'll finally be able to fully chop down this tree!"
Should We Tell Him?	"Hmm, this tree is tough! I think I need something else..." "I heard WIS increases choppin efficiency. I have this recipe for a WIS hat, but I don't specialize in smithing so I can't make it! Make it for me, and I'll give you another stamp!." "Wow, my Choppin Efficiency is mega huge now! This tree wont stand a chance! Come on back later, I'll surely have this tree chopped down to the roots by then!"
Slime for Storage	"Well, I've only got one stamp left, but I'm holding onto it! Buuuut, since you got my previous stamps, I don't really need this storage chest for anything."   "I'll give you my storage chest for... exactly 1 billion slime sludge, and not a single one less! @ QUEST:Get them 50 slime sludge. They're like lv. 3, they'll accept." "Thats uh, quite a few less than a billion. But that Quest Notifier was right, I'll still accept! Here's the storage chest, it's super OP for a big time adventurer like you!"" "Idk what to do with all this sludge! It's very cool looking at least."

Promotheus

Quest name	Dialogue
I'm Ready, Promotion!	"Hello there, adventurer! Uh... I know my bulging sack is quite the eyegrabber, but my face is down here!" "I am the mighty Promotheus, Giver of Class Promotions! I was initially going to fill in for Atlas, but after I saw what Kratos did to him, I decided to lay low in a more obscure game for a while!" "Good thing for that too, because it looks like you could use a promotion, what with you being a Beginner and all that! Come talk to me once you're level 10."
Three Right Answers	"Great, now listen carefully. After I'm done talking here, you'll get the option to choose 1 of 3 Classes. This is a Permanent Decision."   "First, the WARRIOR class. They are close ranged, single target fighters who won't get knocked down easy. They are the slowest moving class, but their brawn makes them great at Physical Skills like Mining." "Next, the ARCHER class. Quick on their feet, they'll rapidly pick off weaker enemies from a distance. They do struggle to take down big targets, but their agility makes them great at Crafting Skills like Smithing." "Lastly, the MAGE class. They'll zap, freeze, burn, or even poison their enemies to death. They will get downed by even the slightest of hits, but their high IQ makes them great at Collection Skills like Choppin." "Now before you decide, I must tell you one more thing..."   "This may sound strange, but this will not be your only character!"   "You will create dozens of characters in your journey, so don't be scared of this decision! Pick the class you think you will enjoy, and know that you'll get to play the other ones soon!" "That's a great choice! Here, take these recipes for that class!. I have more recipes, but you'll have to create new characters and choose different classes to get them!"   "Well, now that we've gotten to know each other a bit, how about I tell you about some game lore?"   "HAH! Just kidding, a game like this doesn't have any lore! ...so anyway, the loremasters of this game speak of an ancient land far above these lazy ol' Blunder Hills."   "In this crazy place, there are weird sub mechanics and overly complicated gameplay systems, the likes of which we simple World 1 NPC's could never comprehend."   "The monsters here are even crazier, many are references to something called 'pop culture', which I assume is some sort of Bubble Religion in their land."   "But how could I possibly know that, right? Well this is where it gets interesting. You see, I've seen one myself, see? But no one seems believes see... err, me."
Slovakian Scare	"It was a giant house, with... legs, or something. I think it only shows up at the top of each hour, but I know it exists! Please, go prove I'm not crazy." "Wait, you actually found it? Huh, guess I won't be selling many of my alien merchandise anymore... you can take some if youd like!"
The Witcher, but not Really	"What did you say it was again, a Baby Yogurt? ... a Baboon Yolo? @ Ohhh, a Baba Yaga of course! Yea, I've never heard of that in my life. I wonder what it drops?" "Did you get anything good? I was talking to the loremasters while you were away, and they tell me this 'Baba Yaga' monster has a chance to drop a pet egg!" "They said the egg is used for future content, so if you ever find it you should probably hold onto it!"

Krunk

Quest name	Dialogue
A Plot to be Perfect	"This may be the most perfect specimen I've ever come across..."   "If only I could achieve such form. Hey human, could you get me some ingredients? I've got an idea." "Interesting, the viscosity of the mana potion prevented it from adhering to the smooth surface of the iron sample, instead rendering it edible!"
The Scientific Method, According to a Rock	"If I am to achieve total substantiative infusion, I'll have to use more sophisticated words so I seem smart enough to bend reality to do my bidding! Fetcheth unto me thine most precious of materials!" "How curious, the gilded particles of those precious metals broke down the structural integrity of the statue, without mitigating its bonus giving qualities!"   "However, I am no closer to turning myself into diamond. My scholarly vocabulary has not aided the inventive process thus far, so perhaps I must take a step back, and be more simple minded..."
King of the Cavern	"Well Bobby, today sure is a fine day for some construction work, I tell you hwat! Nothing beats the satisfaction of creating something with your own two hands, 'specially something that also serves a useful purpose!" "There we have it, now that's a sturdy bridge if ever I've seen one! ...well, I wasn't expecting roleplaying as a hard-working propane salesman to help with my scientific pursuits! And it didnt! I guess I should just give up, I have no other ideas."
???	"Aha, I've got an idea! Quick, go buy 500,000 gems from the Gem Store, I can use them to alter the... what's that? You'd uninstall if that was the actual quest? Alright, give me a moment to think of an alternate plan... Return at Mining Level 33" "You've come at the right time, player! I have devised the perfect strategy to rid me of this worthless rock body!"   "I need you to... Hang on, I'm getting a call from the game developer Lavaflame2... Hey, how are you? ... Oh, is that so? You haven't coded my final quest yet? I see, sure, I'll let them know. Sorry player, you'll have to wait until later to do my final quest!"

Mutton

Quest name	Dialogue
Beatboxing Starterpack	"OI! You there! Whattar you doin' down 'ere then eh? 'avent seen a soul in the longest time, other than that there rock fella. I could use some 'elp if ya got some time."   "Budda bum tshh bbbubbubub shh bobobobo blushutuuu BLAM! That was a sick beatboxing riff I just did heh! Oh I'm sorry, was that out of character for me? Well then we best hope the developer changes this dialogue line before release!" "... he didn't change it? Well, guess I'll go die of embarassme--BAADA DOOSH badabaaaba dododo badtishaba POW! HAH, SIKE! I'm embracing my new identity!"   "Yo but catch this, I ain't gon' be changin' the game lookin' like a fool ... if I'm not totally decked out in swag, ain't no-one gonna take lil' Mutt seriously!" "Yuuus, lil' Mutt lookin' straight sick now! Badabing badaBOOM! Lemme spit some fire for a bit, see how things go"
Clout Chasin'	"Maaaan, you aren't even gonna believe this. I was totally in the zone, rhyming like a genius without a loan, and I didn't go viral! Gimme some exposure, yea? @ QUEST:Beat up the trashiest monsters until Mutt becomes famous" "Aight, now I don't wanna roast you or anything, but 300 followers... that just ain't it. I'm flyin' under the radar, even though I know I can go far."
Cross_Platform_Promotion	"I just... cmon chief, you know I'm good enough! I know Lil' Mutt's a name that'll stay in the game!" "Boom badatshdabada wikikiweeew, I'm totally on the rise! We up to 6300 followers, I can already taste the grammy! That's what we call graham crackers by the way, I've got a few packed for lunch!"
7_Figure_Followers	"But we can't rest just yet, we gotta go full on while we've got momentum!" "A MILLION FOLLOWERS! I'm the biggest thing ever, clever as a feather, only getting better... forever!!! @ Aaand I just got cancelled on Oinkker for an Oink I posted 4 years ago, ughhh." "Oh well, you'll probably help me get a following again on another character. Cya then!"

Builder Bird

Quest name	Dialogue
Restoring Power to the Portal	"Kacaw!" The bird awaits the return of the town gem. It's ready to restore the gem to the portal, allowing travel to World 2. It's very stylish in it's matching orange hat and scarf. "Kacaw! Kacaw!" The bird looks very happy with itself after successfully restoring the portal.

Stiltzcho

Quest name	Dialogue
Outta the Way Slimes	"Hallo! Welcome to tha Jungle. I am pleased to make your aquaintance!" "Scripticas needs help, huh? Hehe he is very funni... I used to talk in my nativ language around him when I lived in town. He could nevar understand me, and would awkwardly say 'uh, yea!' to evarything I said! Best practical joke ever!" "So, what is needed then?   ...someone stole tha town Gem? This is very troubling indeed! I am glad you were sent to me, I believe I may be of help."   "I have heard talk of a beeg golem passing through. I have heard many story of it, they say tha golem was over 400 pixels tall, and was carrying a big sword with a gem on it!" "I can investigate further myself, but I need you to clear a path for me by defeating some of these slimes."    "Thay do respawn very quick, so you must do it fast! Remember to Forfeit the Quest using the Codex if you run out of time!" "Very niiice, now lets see what I can find around here..."
No Stone Unturned	"Aha! Just as I suspected, there is a strange absense of slimes in this area! Thats a clear sign that tha Golem has been this way..."   "Humm, but which way did he go? He was surely too big to fit in tha tree, so he must have gone left."   "There must be some sort of clue there. I'll wait here while you go searching, that way I can be well rested to investigate your find" "Aha! These strange rocks must be pieces of tha golem!"
Investegator by Day, Prankster by Night	"Now then, you found those to the left of here... so, that must mean the golem moved left of here! Oh yeh, it's all coming together..."   "One last thing before I write up a report. It has been so long since I got to play a joke on Scripticas, and I want you to help me pull another one on him!"   "Before I left, I kept putting carrots everywhere he went. I put one on his desk, at his front door, I even put carrots in his dinner! Tha last one didn't work though because he was eating carrot cake that night." "Go get me some carrots and logs so I can make a little carrot mannequin for you to prank him with, and I'll have the report ready when you return!" "Also, about the prank... I kind of messed up and made a nightmare inducing abomination, which isn't tha joke I was going for. You can just keep it instead, okey?"   "Anywho, come back if you ever want to help me on my own scouting missions!"

Funguy

Quest name	Difficulty
Mushroom Munchies	"Hehehe... ohh heyyy there dude! How's it hangin? You ready for the partayyy??"   "Pshh heheh come on my man, don't be like these slithering squaaaares 'round here! You gotta come to the party, it's gonna be soooo killer!!"   "But uh, you gooootta hook us up with some food bro, it's common mushroom manners! Bring it here and we'll carry it to the party with this novelty food bag I bought online when I was... hehehe, well never mind!" "Ahhh you legend, you even brought driiiiinks! Hehehe you're quite the party starter, I like that! Here's that bag I was talking about earlier, all this food should fit riiiiight in hehe!"
Videogame Highscores are COOL!	"Soooo... you're kiiiiinda my plus one for this shindig my guy, so my reps ridin' on you being a toooootally chillin guy. You look heckin' skilled, so lets roll with that..." "You ever played that choppin' minigame? Everyone around here loooves that game, I bet you'd get mad respect if you had a siiiick score to brag about!" "Woahhohoho! Mister sliiick right here, slidin' in with the super high score! You're gonna be a critical hit at the partayyyyyy, believe me!"
Partycrastination	"Buuuuut, it's still not time to go yet. Trust me, you do NOT wanna be the first one to this party... but a kiiiiiller like you already knew that for sure!"] "IT IS TIIIIIIME! Just talk to me again, and I'll use my 'mushroom magic' to teleport all the partiers right here! This is gonna be siiiiiiiick!"
Party Crashin'	"PARTY!!! WOOOOOO! YO CRAB BOY, TOSS ME ANOTHER SLICE BRO! YEA!!! ALRIIIIIIGHT! EVERYBODY GET LOOSE, DO IT UUUUUUUUUUP! " "WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING??? BRO, YOU... ...totally killed it out there! WOOO! You sure know how to partayyyyy!"
???	"What, you thought you were killing them? Hahaha, bro, chill. They're monsters, they'll just respawn back home no biiiiggie! Yo but could you help clean up before headin' out?." "Hey thanks, good stuff back there eh? I'll see you on your next character, party never truly ends hahaha!"

Tiki Chief

Quest name	Difficulty
Brochure Building	"Ooga booga bleaurgh agga blagga!!!"   "Wabbaflabba ga--- CoughCoughCough... wow that was uhh, not a good first impression, sorry about that! Had something in my throat."   "Welcome to the luxurious Encroaching Forest Villas, the perfect travel destination for anyone looking to ditch the grind and just AFK a bunch!"   "Some of our accomodations are still under construction, but you're welcome to check out our latest installment! We had a visitor earlier, some big golem, who agreed to being a tourist attraction in return for a place to stay." "Ah, so you've heard of our golem guest? They're currently staying in the Leafy Lounge, just a few steps to the Right! You could go visit if you like, you'll just need to get some Keys from our vendor" "Or hey, why not help me get the word out about this place? I'm bogged down with chief stuff, but if you get me some ingredients I could make some flyers for you to pass out!" "Great, I can work with this... Ok take these flyers that I made disturbingly quickly and hand them out! But we must be strategic with who we invite..."
Three Strikes, you're Out!	"Invite someone rich to help with business, someone whose totally chillin' to serve as a party starter, and someone tough as a rock to sit at the front desk and not get triggered by entitled moms!" "No one's coming? That can't be! Hmm... they must have declined because they're worried theyd be injured by the goblins on their way over!"
Blame it on the Goblins	"Go defeat some goblins, and then go re-invite everyone from before! I bet they'll be more than happy to come visit without those goblins in the way!" "That didn't convince them? Huh, I guess they just couldn't afford such a luxurious retreat... I mean why else wouldn't they come, right?"
???	"Well at least we've got you, soon to be Valued Customer! Wink Wink! Sorry I had to say that out, but I am wearing a mask here." "Hope you've enjoyed your time here! Here, take this token of mine as thanks for your patronage to my absolutely flawless resort that is just too brilliant for common folk to appreciate!" "I'm still thinking of other schemes to bring in more visitors, come back later and I may have something for you to do."

Sprout

Quest name	Difficulty
Sticks and Stone Something Something Bones...	5
Justice Wears No Clothes	4

Dog Bone

Quest name

Difficulty

Why he Die???

"OOoooooOOOOooOOOooO! Have yoooOOoouuu checked oooOoout ooOOOoour latest exhibit?"   "YoooOooou doOOoon't have a key toooOOOOooO get in? Well I can help yooOoou with that, valued tOooourist, as loooOOoong as you doooOOoo soOOOoomething fooOOOor me first!"   "I dooOOoont knoOOoOow hoOoooww I died, and I am cursed toOOOoo make this 'ooOOooooo' nOoooOOise until I find oOOoout! It's a ghooOOooost thing, it's kinda why we all make that weird nooOOOOoise..." "Figure oOOoout hoOOow I died and I'll give yoOOOoou a key sOooo yoOooo can visit oooOOOur main installment behind that doooOOOor!" "OoooOOOooh, that's how I died... that wolf guy thought I was a bone and buried me here. What a way to go. Oh well. So, about those Boss Keys:"   "Come talk to me every day, and I'll give you another key! I'll keep track up to 3 days, so if you're gone for 3 days, I'll give you 3 keys!"   "Also, for every character you make that makes it this far, I'll give you an additional key per day! You don't have to talk to me on every character either, I'll give you all the keys the first time you tap me!"

World 2 - Yum Yum Desert

Cowbo Jones

Quest name	Dialogue
The Grind Begins...?	"Yall best be turnin' yourself right round, I tell you hwat. Folks in these parts don't take kindly to outsiders like yorself."   "That is, unless yer willin' to prove yerself. Go on, show me whatcha can do!" "Woah there pardner, it don't count if the darn game creator himself does it for ya! that them's cheatin' that is!"
The Pantsless Powerhouse!	"Hows about we getcha a real challenge, somethin' yall grasslickers over in them thar Blunderhills aint never done before... " "Well alrighty! Mighty fine fightin' there pardner, suppose you outsiders aint so bad! But you still best get on out, this town aint big 'nuff fer the two of us!"
No Country for One Character	"Uh... er.. well, tell ya what, it's actually TOO big fer the two of us. Go get some more of them characters, would ya?" "That's more like it, startin' to really look like one of them epic gamers ya hear about in the saloon! You sure can walk the walk, but can ya talk the talk...?"
Say Goodbye to your Dubloon!	"...? Well comeon now then, I asked ya a question! Can ya talk the talk?"   "... so ya can't talk, but don't yall worry yerself, cause I sure know one thing that talks round 'ere:cold hard cash! Bring me round sum' that and we can git into some real business." "Sure is pretty, tell ya hwat! Lemme just... hold onto it for ya, make sure it's real 'n all that."
Alchemical Apprentice	"Moving on then, them monsters gonna whoop yo behind if ya don't use that there Alchemy Cauldron mabobber."   "Listen up, and I'll tell ya how it works: You assign characters to different cauldrons to power them. There are Bubble Cauldrons, on the 1st page, and Liquid Cauldrons, on the 2nd page." "BUBBLE CAULDRONS slowly unlock new bonus bubbles. The small ones are passive, and will give their bonus to all your characters, all the time. The bigger ones must be equipped." "LIQUID CAULDRONS give you different waters to spend on shop items. You can only hold so many liquids, so make sure to use them when you can."  "... you get all that, pardner? Ya better 'ave, cause I'm boutta test ya! Go unlock a bubble, and buy some pure water from the Liquid Shop!" "Yall got yerself some smarts up in that head of yours, yell you hwat! That was some techincal stuff ya just figured out! @ Let's cover one last thing before we start bustin' crime."
Three Vials? Those are Rookie Numbers!	"You can unlock vials by dropping specific resources at the cauldron, in person. Not all resources have their own vial, so ya gotta try 'em all!" "Kiss that tutorial goodbye, yeeeeHAW! Lets get to some real cowboy bid'ness! There's a list of Wanted Criminals wanderin' all about Yum Yum Desert, and each of 'ems got a big ol' EXP bounty on their head."
The Notorious B.O.B	"Me bein' an immobile cactus, I'm still stuck tryna catch the first criminal. He goes by Notorious B.O.B, but ya best believe that aint his real name. He should be 'round here somewhere..." "You found the bugger? That's some right good sleuthing, you're a natural!"
Bake Him Away, Toys	"Well tip me sideways and call me the leanin' cactus of Pisa, ya got him! Now then, lets just take a look at this here signature..."   "Yep, signature sure looks real... REALLY LIKE YOURS! Ya thought you were so smart, hidin' all these years, but I finally caught ya red handed!"   "Yessir, this signature right here is EXACTLY the same one I saw you sign all those Post Office orders with, so there ain't no doubt that you're the real Bandit Bob!"   "This is a mighty fine turn of events, aint it just! Tell you hwat, forget catching criminals... I'm gonna BECOME the criminal! And YOUR gonna help me, unless yer fixin' to get turned in!" "Before we get startin' our crime spree, we gotta look the part. Go get some materials from the Anvil so I can make ya a hat like mine."
???	fill out later

Obol Altar

Complete its quest to unlock Obols.

Quest name	Dialogue
Bad Kitty, get off that altar!	"Zzz... Zzz... meow meow meow... meeeeow... Zzz..."   "... meow... Zzz..." "MROWW! 'The cat jumps off in fear of the pickle. What a silly cat, getting scared of a little pickl-- OH MY GOD THE PICKLE HAS EYEBALLS AAAAAH KILL IT KILL IT!!!'"

Postboy Pablob

Complete his quest to unlock Orders.

Quest name

Dialogue

Signed, Sealed and Lost in the Post

"Delivery? Place the order in the top slot. Incoming package? I dunno find it youself, kinda busy."   "You're looking for work? Cool, glad to hear it. OH, you mean work here at the post office? Uhm, right, lemme think about that..." "Hmm, I do have an opening for a new Order Manager, but that's a very demanding job! Prove to me that you'd be up to the task, and I'll hire you." "You did exactly what I told you to do... I like that. You're hired!"   "Here's the rundown of the job. Several shipping companies use my postal service to deliver orders to their customers. Since I'm stuck in here, it's your job to bring me the items to complete these orders." "Completing orders will give you Delivery Box tokens, which can be spent in the Upgrade Tab. Each of your characters gets a token, so spending them on one character won't remove them from other characters!" "Every 24 hours, all completed orders will refresh, and uncompleted ones will stay the same. Well, that's it, I gotta get back to my post!"   "...get it? Post? Since I'm the postboy...?     Ah come on now, don't try to hide your laughter, I can tell by the look on your face you found it funny! Anyway then, get to filling those orders!"

Speccius

Complete his quest to unlock a Sub Class.

Quest name	Dialogue
More like 'Sleepius' lmao	"mmm... Kebaaaabs, crabby cakes... mmmmmmm... yummmmmmy... zzzzZZzzzzZZZZzz... " "...mmm... huh? Oh hey, uh, whats up, I was just on my break, with my eyes closed, alert as ever! Say, that's a lot of food you got there, you havin' a party or something? Count me out, cake and kebabs are a terrible food combo!"
Specialization Station	"Anyway... now that I'm up, you want a Class Advancement? You definitely look like you could use one! ...err, that came out wrong, sorry! What I meant to say is that you're a noob who needs a better class! Let me tell you how it works." "Class Advancements are basically new classes. However, this will NOT REPLACE your current class. You will continue to get Talent Points for your current Talents."   "So yea, you'll get a brand new set of 15 talents! These talents are separate from your old ones, so every time you level up, you'll get Talent Points to spend on these new talents while also getting Talent Points for the old talents." "Quick recap: Class Advancements give you another tab of Talents to upgrade, which uses a different set of Talent Points than your current Tabs. Go ahead and talk to me again, and I'll let you choose your class advancement!" "A new class, how cool is that!           Also, I let down that rope behind me, so you can keep going! ...zzzZZzZZZZZz..."   "zzZZzz... mmmm, lasagna.... zzZZzz.... Mondays, grrr.... wait, wrong dream... zzZZzz... kebaaabs... mmmm... crabby cakes... ah thats better... zzZZzzz"

Bandit Bob

Quest name	Dialogue
Bullets for Bandit Bob!	"---BANG!---"   "That's for killin' me in Idle Skilling."   " Huh, guess I ain't gettin' my revenge today. Awfully smart of ya, gotta say. Here, take this card as a sign of my respect."   "You ever wonder why that ol' slowpoke succulent of a cactus ain't never caught me before?"   "It's cause no matter what he tries, I always outsmart him! @ Bandit Bob's the name, and being cool's my game."   "So what's that there paper then, some sorta fan letter? Must be, I was quite the superstar back in the day..."   "But it was so tirin', all them fanboys... decided to give it all up to live a more peaceful life of crime and sly trickery."   "Tell you hwat, I'll come out of retirement and sign that fan letter, so long as you get me some bullets! I done used the last of mine on ya, hah!" "Great, these will be perfect for all the other players when they reach this point of the storyline!"
???	"But you gotta do more than just that to earn my signature. Hrmmm... what do I need... how 'bout a new bandana? Maybe I'd look better in yellow." "... yea right then, never mind, I'm stickin' with red. Where'd ya even get this anyway, why's it got sand all over it?"   "Tell ya what I do need... I need that darn Plan-It Express company get their head in the game! I've two orders from them I'm still waitin' on, 'n it's been a week now!"   "You reckon you could go fill those orders for me? Oh, and bring them completed order forms too, would ya?" "My packages arrived! You did real great partner. Lemme take a gander at them there completed forms of yours, the ones with your signature on them, just to make sure everythin's here... Alrighty then! Here's that signed fan letter of yours!"

Goldric

Quest name	Dialogue
Trickle Down Economics	"You weren't expecting 'me' to converse with a commoner such as yourself, were you?? Bah, what a quaint notion! Run along now, and take your poorness with you. Ta-ta!"

Whattso

Quest name	Dialogue
Mopey Dick	"O.O" "O.O" What are they looking at? "`-`" They look even sadder now, try doing something else...
The Whaley Hard Minigame	"T.T"

TP Pete

Quest name	Dialogue
Roll of Anger	"Hey you! Yes you, the one who isn't poop... think you could help me out?"   "I just lost my job. Stupid poops, they think they're so much better than me! I was made to be better than them, literally!"   "That's it, I've had it with this place! I want retribution, and I want it NOW! @ QUEST:Go defeat 50 poops in 200 seconds." "Hah, that'll show them! But, for some reason, blindly taking out my rage on others didn't actually make me feel better... I guess I still miss my old job and all that."
Fired for BS Reasons!	"You know what, I bet one of these darn rats stole it! They came in from the surface one day, and have been hogging up all the jobs ever since! @ QUEST: Defeat rats for employment research!" "Great, this will prove my case! I'll get my job back for sure, and maybe even a pay-raise!"
???	"I can't believe this!!! These so called 'statisticians', which doesn't even sound like a real job, told me my stats were 'utterly invalid in every sence of the word', and that I shouldn't be angry at others for my own problems!" "That's it, we're going straight to the source, I have no other choice. I need you to confront my old boss for me."   "My boss is a total piece of.... well, you'll see when you meet him! His office is to the left." "You got me my job back! Now I can get paid while I sit here and do nothing! What, did you think I got fired for no reason?"
???	"Ahh, life is finally as it should be, and the good guy, me, prevailed! You should come back later though, I'm sure there are some rotten apples out there who will try to ruin things! @ Return at Class Lv. 70" "Uh, did I say level 70? I meant 170... thousand. Yea, come back at Lv. 170000 and I'll probably have a new quest by then."

Fishpaste97

Quest name

Dialogue

'Accidental' Exploit

"Hey there, what's your fishing level?"   "That's cool... mines 22, haha! Pretty good, I know. I'm a Barbarian class, so it's kinda my specialty."   "So, whatcha doin' out here? You know any cool fishing places for a pro like me?"   "You haven't gotten past this map yet either? Oh... Hey can you get me some Butterflies while I'm training? I haven't made a Bowman yet so I cant catch much." "Cool, thanks a million! I'd add you as a friend, but my friendslist is full, sorry! @ Return Next Update!"

Scubidew

Quest name	Dialogue
Don't Step to Me, Bro!	"No way bro, I'm not gettin' in there bro there's no way, BACK OFF!!"   "Yo haven't you seen? Or not seen, I guess? There's heckin CREEPS chillin' just below that ocean surface, crazy scary monsters that'll bite your face off! Why else they make the surface so hard to see through?" "Look, you wanna help?? Show me there ain't no monsters down there. This mask helps me breath, sure, but it ain't no binoculars!" "Hey hey come on now bro, that's heckin' fishy of you to just show up with these. You obviously just bought them at a fish market."
???	"If you actually went fishin' yourself, youd' have been pulled in by a giant squid, guarantee it! Go on, prove me wrong, betcha cant!" "Pfft yea right, I'm not falling for that! I totally saw you dump 10 regular fish in right before you started catching! Absolutely pathetic, you didn't even try to hide your trickery either."
???	"Say... you're awfully insistant on convincing me that the ocean isn't full of monsters. I KNEW IT! You're in cahoots with BlueAnon, who's trying to resurrect the one who shall not be named in a coup to take power from Lavaflame!" "Well, I ain't lettin' you do it! I.. WAIT NO DON'T CUT OFF MY QUESTLINE I WAS JUST GETTING STAR-- Return Next Update!"